Crying in the Candy Aisle and Other Highlights of My Week

Things are good here. Really.

Which is why my experience in the candy aisle at Jewel-Osco last night was such a headscratcher. I was perusing the chocolate options (since we were plum out, and we can’t get to Trader Joe’s for another couple of days), when Simply Red came over the store’s speakers. As soon as that curly redhead started crooning If you don’t know me by now . . . I suddenly lost it. Big old alligator tears threatening to spill all over the ugly linoleum tile.

That song has pretty much always done that to me, but I generally have better control of myself in public places.

Maybe it was because I was alone and had gone the entire day without chocolate. Maybe it was because it was the second day of my period and I’d gone the ENTIRE DAY without chocolate. Maybe it was because I haven’t cried in, oh, I don’t know, a few months at least? I used to cry more often. Motherhood, or life perhaps, has toughened me up a bit.

I clearly need to purge more frequently, because bawling in the candy aisle just doesn’t do anyone any good. I pulled myself together long enough to grab my Lindt 70% dark chocolate bar and hit the self-check.

I was fully prepared to let the dam burst in the car, but then I was faced with something too ridiculous to not laugh at. Parked next to me was a big old white Hummer with a big old American flag flying off the back of it, and a license plate that said TROUPR. And climbing into this overpriced, overstated look-at-me-mobile was the gooniest dude I’ve ever seen. I would have expected some tattooed, tough-looking military guy. But this was Bill Gates carrying an extra 75 pounds. The image was just too funny, and it pulled me right out of whatever sappy reverie I’d tripped into in the candy aisle.

Being a woman is such an emotional thrill ride sometimes.

So, other highlights:

– Found out our lease will be up April 30 of next year and the owner’s going to sell the house. So we’ll be moving next spring. Yippee.

– I reminded myself yet again why I don’t read fiction books. I become obsessed with the darn things. I downloaded a free book on my Kindle because it had good reviews, and it turned out to be a mix between a detective/mystery novel and a Christian romance. Interesting combo. A bit cheesy, but I liked it. Then I got another one called “The Mind Readers,” which wasn’t very well-written, but it had a compelling storyline. Now I’m on two others, plus a couple of non-fiction books. And all I want to do is read, which I really don’t have much time for.

– We kicked off our summer school schedule this week. We’re doing theme weeks, and I chose an earth science/nature approach. So here’s what we’re going to be focusing on this summer:

Week 1 – SUN, MOON, STARS
Week 2 – PLANETS
Week 3 – ROCKS & MINERALS
Week 4 – TREES
Week 5 – FLOWERS
Week 6 – INSECTS
Week 7 – BIRDS
Week 8 – AMPHIBIANS & REPTILES
Week 9 – FISH & OCEAN LIFE
Week 10 – MAMMALS
Week 11 – KID PROJECTS

I’ll try to post some about what we’re doing with these topics. Today we learned about Ptolemy’s geocentric model of the universe and Copernicus’s heliocentric one. Good stuff.

– Got a Groupon for a live animal show to come to the house for Dolittle’s birthday. Totally psyched about that one.

– Speaking of animals, we now have three rats. Sadly, Cinnamon passed away a couple of months ago. The girls convinced us to get two more, so now Midnight has two friends – Arwen and Pepper. They’re cute.

So, as I said, things are good. Aside from my random emotional almost-meltdowns in public places, things are great.

(Am I the only one who ever has random emotional almost-meltdowns in public places for no apparent reason? And is it “plum” out of chocolate or “plumb” out of chocolate? I need to know these things.)

 If you enjoyed this post, please pass it along. You can follow Motherhood and More on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram.