10 Ways to Procrastinate Like a Pro

I’m not a fan of procrastination. It’s a terrible habit, and one I certainly don’t advise.

But I am extraordinarily skilled at it. I could give procrastination master classes. It’s a special gift.

Since they say you should highlight your strengths, I’ve collected a list of my favorite ways to put things off and the thought processes behind them:


I like to really savor my coffee first thing in the morning. And second thing in the morning. Maybe just another half-a-cup. Oops, poured too much. Three cups it is.


I have to do something that I don’t really want to do. Gosh, I’m suddenly famished. Better have a snack first.


I have to be super desperate to procrasticlean, since cleaning is usually the thing I procrastinate doing, but it’s been known to happen. Shine, little stovetop, shine.


So I haven’t paid the bills or put away the laundry or returned those e-mails, but at least my pantry is labeled and alphabetized.


I already got what I came for, but I should probably go up and down every single aisle really slowly, just for good measure. Wouldn’t want to miss any screamin’ deals.


I wonder if I have any messages. I wonder if anyone commented on that link I shared. What’s everyone doing now? How about now? I wonder if anyone has posted any funny cat videos today. Scroll . . . scroll . . . scroll . . .


It’s only 140 characters, so it’s only semi-procrastinating. Scroll . . . scroll . . . scroll . . .


Why actually DO the things you find on Pinterest, when you can spend time pinning more things to DO? Hmmm.


Speaking of cat videos . . . and how about those screaming goats? Darned funny.


Relationships are important. “Hey. Whatcha doooooiiiiin?

Now if I could just figure out a way to PROCRASTIEXERCISE, I’d be golden.

Do any of those ring true for you?

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Annie writes about life, motherhood, world issues, beautiful places, and anything else that tickles her brain. On good days, she enjoys juggling life with her husband and homeschooling her children. On bad days, she binges on chocolate chips and dreams of traveling the world alone.

Comments 5

  1. Oh my gosh! I am so happy I found your blog. I read your essay on extended breastfeeding and it was amazing! I am currently nursing my first toddler (third child) and looking for lots of validation, because people are starting to think it’s a bit weird. I only nurse at bedtime and morning, but had to nurse him once during the day, and my six-year-old looked at me in horror and said, “He still drinks Mama milk?” and then proceeded to laugh hysterically. I could not stop laughing as I pictured your almost three-year-old casually asking you, “Wanna nurse?” It’s still making me smile. And I love this post because I, also, am an expert procrastinator. In fact, I’m procrastinating, like, 10 things as I write this. Sorry for rambling. Just happy to have found you!

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